Fathering and the Great Outdoors

When I was asked to write a fathering column, I had a few ideas about what I could write. Should I write about Swiss fathering or about my experiences as a part-time, full-service dad? I am a father who shares custody of a 12-year-old son, so I cook, do laundry and help with homework. I found I’d have plenty to write about.

But after I agreed to write the column I was told that the subject of the issue is “The Great Outdoors.” That’s tougher, I thought. Where are the fathering aspects in this subject? The father-son camping trip that never happened will not fill this column. In German we don’t even have an expression for “The Great Outdoors,” which is interesting to begin with. It’s not that we don’t have a great outdoors in Switzerland, but I guess we just call it Natur. Natur sounds much less glamorous. It sounds like flowers and animals; it sounds like something that is happening without us humans being there, necessarily. “The Great Outdoors,” on the other hand, sounds like camping, making a fire, white water rafting, and climbing. It sounds like human activity. It also sounds like responsible behavior and protecting the environment. Partying at the lake the whole night and leaving your trash behind is hardly meant here, in spite of taking place outside.

“The Great Outdoors” also sounds like the opposite of “The-not-so-Great Indoors,” and here is where parenting comes into play. All parents I know think it’s good for children to spend time outside. Why? Fresh air, physical activity, and meeting friends – the answers are obvious. We parents are glad they are not surfing the Internet or playing on their game consoles, but to be honest, often we are just glad to have some peace and quiet while the children are outside.

With my son I have it relatively easy, as his biggest passion is football (I don’t want to call it soccer; do you know why it is even called soccer? Look it up, it’s interesting). So there is no lack of being outdoors and experiencing physical activity with my son. But is this the great outdoors or just outdoors? And where am I as a father in this? My son and I are season pass holders of our local football club, so we spend a lot of time outdoors together. To sit in a stadium for two and a half hours when it’s -10°C (12°F) is definitely an outdoor experience, and yet doesn’t really qualify as a great, outdoor adventure.

So what makes the outdoors great? I guess we have to bring nature back into the equation. An adventure in the great outdoors obviously requires more nature than a football playing field. I guess a certain absence of civilization is necessary. Even a bike trip along asphalted roads doesn’t necessarily count.

So why is fresh air and physical activity not enough? Why should we bring children to the forest or the mountains? Will kids enjoy a nice view or a beautiful tree? I doubt it. Although I spent a lot of time hiking and in nature when I was a child – most often forced by my parents – I don’t think I had eyes for the beauty of nature. And yet, I think I learnt how nature looks, feels and smells. And while probably not having had an eye for beauty (at least I can’t remember that I had), I think I enjoyed the diversity and unpredictability of the experience. There was always something to discover around the next corner.

Now that I am older I love to hike and be in nature. I don’t know if this is because my parents made me hike as a child, but in any case they obviously didn’t ruin it for me. Reason enough to spend more time in nature with my own son.

By Thomas Maurer

Thomas, 49, lives near Zurich. He is divorced and takes care of his 12-year-old son half the time.