Nurturing Cultural Pride

Culture is one of the things that you may not think about much when you’re living in your own country, but you become a lot more aware of it as part of your identity when you move to another country – even more so when you have children. You find yourself thinking about how you will bring your children up and how you will pass your culture on to them. You worry that at some point they might rebel against your culture because they simply want to fit in with the culture where they live.

You try to learn from the experiences of the people around you who are in a similar situation. But it’s not easy. You know it will not be easy for your children, and it is also not easy for us as parents who are proud of our own cultures, and who in one way or the other want our cultures to be part of our children’s identity as well.

Culture is values, beliefs, habits, and the way one acts and thinks about things. It’s a big part of identity. Cultures vary across countries and regions of the world. The fact that in some countries people do things differently doesn’t necessarily mean that one is better than the other. When you move away from your home country, you become aware of these differences. With time you adapt to many aspects of the culture you are living in; you may even acquire new habits, but in most cases you will still miss certain things in your own culture.

Having lived in Switzerland for six years now, I find myself missing many things about my Egyptian culture. I don’t know what it’s like for other people, but in my case there are certain things that I miss more with time, even more after having children. One of the things I miss most is the warmth in human relations. Every time we come back to Switzerland after visiting our families, it breaks my heart that Giggles and Cuddles are growing up away from their grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and second cousins. In our culture, extended family is very important. The familial bond is not just limited to blood relations, but in a way close friends and their families become family as well. Six years later I still feel the warmth whenever I go back home, not just from family and close friends but also neighbours, previous work colleagues, the doorman in my parents’ apartment building and the pharmacist around the corner. The affection they all show towards Giggles and Cuddles is unmatched, and this is what hits me when we come back to Switzerland: that the girls aren’t surrounded by the same warmth and affection from the people around us.

It is true that in the modern world we now live in, one has access to a lot of things that make living abroad easier for us. With the vast advances in telecommunication, we can have free video calls with our family and friends no matter where they are. We can watch movies and listen to songs through satellite or the Internet, and we can find many ingredients to cook our favourite dishes. I am grateful for all these things, as Giggles and Cuddles are growing up with frequent contact with their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. I’m able to cook Egyptian food for them and play them Arabic children’s songs.

Language is a major aspect of one’s culture, so at home we make a point of only speaking Arabic to the girls, and when they get a bit older we will teach them to also read and write in Arabic, so that they’re exposed to not just movies and songs but also the very rich Arabic literature. This way they will learn their history and have a better understanding of the cultural heritage of their people. It is important to me that they be aware of their roots.

We would also like them to be integrated in the Swiss culture, be equally fluent in Swiss German and have Swiss as well as international friends. In my mind I know how I would like them to become, but I’m also aware that at some point they will feel that they are caught between two cultures, and like all children they will want to blend in and be part of the mainstream culture. What I am still not clear about, but hope to learn with time, is how to deal with that situation, so that they end up embracing their parents’ culture and not rebelling against it. From the many examples I’ve seen around me and the experiences I’ve read about, people who have pride in their own culture and are at the same time open to the culture they live in are the ones who are able to succeed and live happily. So I hope that no matter where their wings will take them in the future, and no matter which place they call “home,” Giggles and Cuddles will still have their roots in their Arabic culture and will always be proud of their heritage.

By Didi in Zurich

Didi is an Egyptian mother of twin girls living in Zurich. Before having the twins she worked in the field of Economic Development. She is currently a stay-at-home mom focused on the growth and development of her daughters.

Illustration by Susana Gutierrez

Susana is a mother of two little girls who moved to Zurich  four years ago, during the maternity leave of her first daughter. She is originally from Spain but lived in London for almost 10 years. She has a very eclectic career from acting to Law, to IT project management. Drawing however has always been a permanent hobby of hers.