The Hills Are Alive

My family is nearing the end of a week filled with fevers, chills, body aches and runny noses. All of us came down with the bug, one by one. Ski break is over and the kids go back to normal routines tomorrow. My column was due yesterday. It’s time to get creative.

The plan for this cloudy winter day at the infirmary is movies. We start with The Sound of Music. It is a nice, long movie that reminds us that someday, the sun will shine again around here and everyone will bounce back to life. It also provides little bits of inspiration for my family’s growing need for creativity.

I encounter challenges every day that call for creative solutions. All of the day’s simple routines require synchronization and cooperation. “Papa” von Trapp handled seven children in the movie, but he also had a governess, used a whistle and everyone called him Captain. Those are three things that I do not have going for me, yet this classic movie does offer some good lessons.

Knowing your children, having fun together and helping each other in times of need are the real lessons I take away from the story. You have to be creative because these simple things are not always easy to achieve. Getting to know your children, for example, involves much more than just asking them questions about their day during dinner time. Everyone is a bit tired in the evening and the conversation is really more of a question and answer session. Personally, I prefer a quiet dinnertime, like the Captain.

I believe good conversations come up when nothing is forced and everyone is just having fun together. It’s about finding times when everyone is in the mood to talk and play. Holidays and weekends are obvious opportunities, but it is nice to find times in between. It usually happens when we are out shopping or passing the time while waiting for ballet to finish. Of course, that is easy for a parent who is at home all day, more challenging for the working spouse.

As challenging as it may be if you have a large family, I think it is really important to make time to have fun activities with each child, one-to-one. Older children sometimes do not wish to participate in “forced family fun” times and they deserve a break, too. Taking a day off from work when the forecast is good and enjoying a day of skiing with your son or daughter, or taking a train ride somewhere new is fantastic! I think it means a lot and children love it when they know a special day was created just for them.

Doing this constantly doesn’t really make sense, but doing it periodically throughout the year is a great way to see how our children are changing. It’s about keeping connected to who they are, in the present day. I have been warned that my sweet daughter is going to turn on me one day. I know this happens, I just hope I can see it coming and will be able to talk through it.

As long as we have a good understanding of each other, regardless of how that comes about, I think everyone in the family will naturally know how to be there for each other when someone is struggling. If all else fails, I’ll remember to sing and dance!

by Brian Wilson

Brian is the father of three children. He teaches golf and coordinates a Zurich dads’ group in his spare time. Email: bwilsoniag@gmail.com

Illustration by Lara Friedrich

Lara has been a freelance illustrator for Mothering Matters since early 2013. She is a demo singer for the songwriter Kate Northrop and has also written an article for the newspaper March Anzeiger. Lara is bilingual in English and German with a Cambridge Advanced Certificate in English. She is in her first year at University.