Talking moves us forward
Anyone who has tried to decipher two-year-old speak knows it is no easy task. We know they are trying to tell us something, but we may have no clue what that something is. Don’t feel bad if it takes a while to figure it out. The important thing is that we realize they are learning how to communicate with words, and soon they will be able to do things we never before thought was possible.
There are many milestones during childhood, and it is natural for all of us to think, “my child is not ready yet” or “he/she is too young to comprehend this right now”. While this may be true, children would not get anywhere if we didn’t encourage them to take the next step. Maybe we should give children more credit than we think they deserve.
We are not born knowing what life is all about, so we need the experiences of childhood to help us understand basic things like what is right and wrong and when you need to say sorry. Life experiences like these need to be introduced, explained and enforced. Your son or daughter may not understand what’s happening the first time you put them in a time out, but they will start to get it once they have calmed down and you get the chance to explain.
I believe it is critical to understand that children pick up on every little thing we do. It is important that we follow through when we are trying to teach them a lesson. When we help them face challenges and push through, time and time again, it teaches them not to give up. I believe this pattern of finishing our business and moving on eventually sinks in and becomes part of who they are.
Some stages of life take some time to get through, and I believe it is very important that parents keep progress in mind and stay clear of regression and second thoughts. Things can get rough but you shouldn’t back down just because your child puts up some resistance. As long as they are able to communicate with words, they can learn valuable lessons as they pull through difficult times.
Potty training is one of those things that can take some time to accomplish and techniques vary. My wife and I received a tip from a friend who said the three-day potty training guide really worked for her. She said most children are ready to make the switch when they are able to tell us they are wet or dirty. The guide’s approach focuses on making it fun and positive, quitting diapers “cold turkey” and just “moving on”, so it made sense to me. I was hoping the process would be quick and fairly painless. Surprisingly, it was just that for all three of our children.
The training involves a few months of prepping to get them acquainted with the idea, but once they were clearly able to communicate wet and dirty diapers, we blocked a long weekend and went for it. Every single diaper was thrown away in a sort of opening ceremony and within a week, they were 99% accident free. Diapers were gone from day one, even for naps and nighttime! Girls were each 27-months-old and our boy was 30-months and not at all scarred by the experience.
After our boy finished his training, he suddenly started doing other “big boy” things. So it seems he really was ready.
By Brian Wilson
Brian is the father of three children. He teaches golf and coordinates a Zurich Dads’ group in his spare time. Email: bwilsoniag@gmail.com
Illustration by Lara Friedrich
Lara has been a freelance illustrator for Mothering Matters since early 2013. She is in her second year of University where she’s currently working as an assistant in a research project in pedagogy. Lara is also an assistant translator from German to English for various fiction books, as well as being a demo singer for the songwriter Kate Northrop.
